| Location | Blackpool |
| Age | 44 years |
| Date of Birth | 12/1962 |
| Date of Death | 4/2007 |
| Visitors | 9,553 since 01/05/2007 |
| Creator |
´*•.¸(*•.¸♥ ¸.•*´)¸.•*´
♥«´¨`•°Bernard ´¨`»♥
¸.•*(¸.•*´♥ `*•.¸)`*•.¸
ღ Good morning Bernie ღ
. ♥ *Sprinkling* .
ღ. . * ♥ . ღ * . * ♥.
♥. *Your * Page ღ*
ღ . . * ♥ . * . * ღ
.* ღ With Loads .* ♥
. * ♥ * * ღ . * ♥ *
ღ * . of Love ♥ . *
My Angel
(\ ●♥● /)
( \(_)/ )
(_ /|\ _)
../___\
This is our big brother, he will always be remembered as being just "bernie" to myself and my
younger brother David.
Bernard Hamer 8th December 1962 - 28th April 2007 00.50am
Died age 44 years young.
My big brother bernard has been taken far too soon without a goodbye. And its on this website I
share my feeling emotionals and tributes to my brother without prejudice to anybody and its not my
intention to hurt or upset anybodt, but feelings are feelings and we all hurt because of Bernie's
death.
I have used some of your photos on this website to show everybody photos of Mike Jenny Jack Ethan
Megan Joshua and Ben, I have no photos of Jessica or Daniel I am sorry.
Bernards inquest was held on 25th October and the verdict was "Misadventure".
Cause of death *Poisoning by alcohol and Citalopram*
Bernie was a binge drinker and could go on real benders but he never took pills when he was drinking
daily which he drank alot of cider towards the end but his liver was not damaged in anyway, all his
organs were ok.
Your funeral was Monday 14th May at 2pm at Agecroft in the place where all our family have rested.
I think your at peace, but I will never know. you will be our dad Bernard Martin who sadly died by
taking his own life. Bernard has gone to spend the rest of eternity with our dad Bernard Martin.
I wished I had one chance to share my feelings with you face to face rather than like this, I came
to see you to say goodbye, I still cannot accept your gone. I cannot think of you without feeling
sad.
Life is not fair sometimes and you should not be where you are, you should be on the beach with the
kids having donkey rides, laughing and sharing the good times, or going to the bookies chewing pens,
one of your favourite annoying pastimes!!
Our dad Bernard Martin died by his own hand of suicide on January 15th 1973, He was 30years old
Bernie was 10years old when dad hung himself by a tree in a local school ground in Swinton.
Dads family never told my us about our dads death. We sat and read in the journal whilst living in
Clifton Drive in Swinton. Bernie always asked our mum why did ouir dad hanged himself. We were
aware of some letters that dad wrote before he died, but we never got to see them. Nobody ever gave
bernie or I the answers he so desparately needed to know. The fact was I didnt blame our mum for our
dads death I was younger than Bernie, but he always blamed our mum for dads death and that was sad
that she had to deal with that because it wasnt really fair.
Bernie over the years never came to terms with dads death, and I remember one of his own suicide
attempts he believed that he had seen our dad in the cremetery in walkden shouting him. Bernie
arrived home that night to mum and I, we ended up at the hospital. Bernie suffeered depression on
and off during his life and I believe dads death didnt help him he lived with not knowing for all
his life.
Bernards paranoia was his own worse enemy, and when he was down and depressed it was awful, it was
heartbreaking to see him sometimes. The times mum and I have ended up on hospital after he has tried
and failed to commit suicide is scary. Pressure was bad when we young, Bernie's seeked attention in
the wrong way. I remember him being in hospital on Christmas Day along time ago and not wanting to
see mum or I, how heartbreaking was that he must have been so drugged up he didnt know what was
going on.
I really wish bernie had contacted one of us before he died I cannot accept he mixed the substances
together, I had since found out he was in money debt and did this influence him?? that we will never
no. Something must have trigged this off and I believe we will never know the truth, I suppose I
accept I only know what I am told but it is a question that should have been anwered months ago.
Its sad that when you lose somebody in death the grief is hard to deal with, and 20 years ago when
Bernie was attempting suicide I was dealng with it in a better way. Now is not so easy as I do not
know the real reasons behind Bernie death and we know we will never find out and even if we did
would we believe it??
I still today coming up April 2008 one year after his death, do not accept Bernie death, I keep alot
of my feelings to myself and dont open up to many people, I wish I could but I cant its hurts too
much. I just wish he had made one phone call even if it had been to mum and he had not seen her for
over 3 years before he died. In that period of time Bernie had changed alot he drank and he gambled
as we know thats what bernie did before. But something different he had changed into somebody we
really didnt know and we had not been given the chance to know.
I ask myself would Bernie have really wanted to die?? did he leave a note?? we dont know and he knew
the tragic circunstances of our dad death that the "not knowing" was hardest thing to deal with,
questions run a mock in your head, WHY did he do this, what pushed him to? I believe Bernie did
take all those tablets and the drink and I believe in my own mind that he wanted peace... But why
leave a 16 week old baby????
I didnt attend Bernie inquests for reasons I do not wish to go into, at 42 years old I had been
informed third hand information which I believe was used a tool to cause distress and hurt. It was
Bernie's inquest and it was turned into a circus and a way to hurt people. Something that happened
42 yrs ago had nothing to do with this. Its sad at what some people will go to at length to cause
upset.
I got married 9th June 2007 I know you where there with my dad and James. I love you all very much,
Dave was there we shed a tear as you well know because somewhere in that room you were watching.. we
all felt sad dancing to your song and crying holding each other, looking at our photos of you and me
as kids next to our cake. You played a part in the service, Gary and Becky did you proud they shared
your memoires with over 60 guests, which left tears of you and James in everybodies eyes.
Rest in peace, my questions are stil not answered and I love you all the same, memories will stay
with me until one day we will meet again.
Bernard you are loved so much and this site is my tribute to your self with us and I share my love
and respect for you for all eternity.
On 28th April 2007, Bernie was in a sad sad place and what was going through his mind is scary and I
wish he had asked somebody for help, nothing is so bad that it cannot be resolved.
Only Bernie now knows the truth I sincerely hope my big brother is at peace, no more depression no
money tormention of his soul wanting answering to questions. His paranoia of life ended that sad
night and life as we know it will never be the same again.
Bernard Hamer - 8th December 1962 - 28th April 2007
Bernard Martin - 4th march 1943 - 15th January 1973
I hope you both are at peace you have both waited a lifetime for your souls to meet again. I cannot
change anything that has happened i wish you hadnt left us all.
I miss my brother and wish we all knew the truth and just one question for me would be WHY.
Pauline x
Gary & Becky xx
Dave x
xxxxxxxxxx
´*•.¸(*•.¸♥ ¸.•*´)¸.•*´
♥«´¨`•°Bernard¨`»♥
¸.•*(¸.•*´♥ `*•.¸)`*•.¸
☆ * ☆ * A Letter from Heaven * ☆ * ☆
☆ * ☆ * ☆ * ☆ * ☆ * ☆ * ☆ * ☆ * ☆ * ☆ * ☆
To those I love,
You hold on to me so tightly in your hearts - where I shall always be.
Your concern has always been for me, but I wonder how you are doing.
You will never know all the prayers that have been prayed for you. the tears that have been shed over your grief and the concern that has been shown for you in multitude of ways, but I find it so comforting to know you havent been left alone.
Please know that I am not alone, either. The death that hurt you the most has given me the gift of eternal life. Never let anyone tell you God doesnt exist. If you need to be mad at Him for awhile, that's okay; He can handle it. But never let hate, anger or bitterness fuel your emotions. Talk to Him and let Him talk to you. Listen for Him in the voices of the people who love and care about you, and let His Word reassure you that I am doing just fine.
It's comforting to know that you hold me so close while struggling with the prospect of letting me go. You need to know, that we will always be together.
Eternity is not " out there" eternity is now! I have simply moved a little farther
ahead of you.
Remember that God never wastes anything - especially love.
The love that we shared on earth will be even greater in Heaven. For now, you must rest assured that I am safe in God's Perfect Love. I would like you to take some of the love you have for me and share it with those around you. You can never run out of love - the more you give away, the more you will have....and let others love you.... you are worth loving!
Be patient with yourselves. You will make some mistakes and you will even find yourselves ot thinking about "me" from time to time. That's all right too....... All my needs are being met; you need to take care of you. Hold onto one another, help each other, give hope and love to all you meet.
Above all, be prepared to welcome others into your wolrd of grief and mourning. You are being taught valuble lessons that will need to be passed along. Some will not have the strength, many will not have your faith, and most will feel they are alone; but all will need the love and understanding only you will be able to give. Now, your pain is the only credential you need to minister to others. When you think of me, never think of me as being alone.
Think of me as smiling laughing and enjoying all that God has prepared for me.
Finally, never believe you are alone. Do not focus on what you have lost, but
look always at what you have left. You are surrounded by people who love and care about you. Live with them - love with them - share with them - laugh with them ...
Make everyday a celebration of life - a life that will never end.
We will meet again - and until we do - know that I am so very proud of you
for not giving up!!!!
From - Your Loved one's in Heaven
☆ * ☆ * ☆ * ☆ * ☆ * ☆ * ☆ * ☆ * ☆ * ☆ * ☆
WITH LOVE FROM TINA ALWAYS
♥Sometimes♥
♥Sometimes when you cry no one sees your tears♥
♥When your worried no one sees your pain♥
♥When your happy no one sees your smile♥
♥When your thinking no one is about♥
♥When you want to talk no one is around♥
♥When you need a special friend♥
♥Im always here to lend a had♥
♥No matter were you are or how far♥
♥just give me a call and i will be there♥
♥Send this to someone special♥
♥I JUST DID♥
JUST WANT TO SAY MY FOREVER FRIEND♥ YOU HAVE MADE IT EASIER TO BEAR LOSING MY BROTHER♥ KNOWING I HAVE SUCH CARING THOUGHTFULL FRIENDS IS A GOD SEND THANKYOU SOOOOOO MUCH♥♥ YOUR TRULY AN ANGEL ON EARTH ♥ALL MY LOVE HUGS KISSES FROM TINA ♥♥ GOD BLESS YOU ♥♥♥
♥Sometimes♥
♥Sometimes when you cry no one sees your tears♥
♥When your worried no one sees your pain♥
♥When your happy no one sees your smile♥
♥When your thinking no one is about♥
♥When you want to talk no one is around♥
♥When you need a special friend♥
♥Im always here to lend a had♥
♥No matter were you are or how far♥
♥just give me a call and i will be there♥
♥Send this to someone special♥
♥I JUST DID♥
At last it works.... again!!
Hi bernie
I seem to have had loads of problems with this site constantly blocking me out!!! Are you playing with my login details.
Anyway just wanted to say sorry for not being able to get in it seems there was a problem with dupicate email adressess and passwords etc..
I am here so feel free to stop by and say hello. You know you have been in my thoughts but its been hard to try and get my messages to you. I hve not been to blackpool for a long time, and I hope you understand why.
Love you lots we were talking about you at weekend having a laugh talking about old stuff.
Love you lots and thank god I can get back in here now.
xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx
Broken hearts and shattered dreams,
Life torn apart at its seams.
Hearts and minds in pain and sorrow,
Missing you more, today, tomorrow.
Time can't heal and words won't mend,
The loss we feel at this sad end.
However long 'till we meet again,
You'll be remembered , but until then,
We wait with hope within in our hearts,
We'll be together, no more to part.
A SPECIAL FRIEND X
.☆ * ☆ * ☆ * ☆ *☆ * ☆ * .☆ * ☆ * ☆ * ☆ *☆ * ☆
If u love me as a friend u'll read the whole thing. What would you do if for every moment you were truly happy there would be 10 moments of sadness? What would you do if your best friend died tomorrow and you never got to tell them how you felt? So, I just wanted to say, even if I never talk to you again in my life, you are special to me and you have made a difference in my life. I look up to you, respect you, and truly cherish you. Send this to all your friends, no matter how often you talk, or how close you are, and send it to the person who sent it to you. Let old friends know you haven't forgotten them, and tell new friends you never will. Remember, everyone needs a friend. dont ever leave the one u love for the one u like, because the one u like will leave u for the one they love.
If you wake up in a red room with no windows and doors, DON'T panic.. you're just in my heart!!! Send this to all the friends you want to keep forever...
.☆ * ☆ * ☆ * ☆ *☆ * ☆ * .☆ * ☆ * ☆ * ☆ *☆ * ☆
THANK YOU
A thank you to all the people who visit our angels Peter, David & Violet and help us get through each day .
WE THANK YOU LORD FOR ALLOWING THEM THE CHANCE TO SEE YOUR LOVE.
FOR YOU SENT THEM A VERY SPECIAL ANGEL WHO NOW DWELLS WITH YOU ABOVE.
COULD YOU PLEASE JUST TAKE A MINUTE AND HOLD THEIR ANGEL TIGHT.
TELL HIM THAT THEY LOVE HIM AND THINK OF HIM EACH NIGHT.
THEY MISS HIM MORE THAN WORDS CAN SAY AND THEIR HEARTS ARE WITH HIM ALWAYS.
ASK HIM TO WATCH OVER THEM UNTIL YOU CALL THEM HOME.
THEY KNOW HOW LUCKY THEY WERE BECAUSE A ANGEL LIKE THEIR'S ARE VERY HARD TO FIND.
JUST ONE MORE THING BEFORE WE GO...
WE WANT TO THANK YOU ONCE AGAIN,
YOU KNEW WE WOULDN'T COPE WITH OUR LOSS ALONE AND YOU SENT US A GROUP OF SPECIAL FRIENDS.
WHO SHARE OUR THOUGHTS WE DON'T HAVE TO BE AFRAID IF WE NEED TO BREAK DOWN AND CRY BECAUSE THEY WILL CRY WITH US,
THEY UNDERSTAND THE WAY WE FEEL BECAUSE THEY ALSO HAVE SAID GOOD-BYE TO SPECIAL PEOPLE WHO HAVE BECOME YOUR ANGELS.
THEIR ANGELS ARE THERE WITH YOU TOO WE ASK YOU TO WATCH OVER THEM UNTIL THEIR FAMILY CHAIN IS ONCE MORE COMPLEAT.
WE LOVE AND MISS THEM ALL
THANK YOU LORD FOR ALL OF OUR GONE TOO SOON FRIENDS!
LOVE ALWAYS SANDRA, MICHAELA & OUR ANGELS PETER, DAVID & VIOLET XXXXX
Have a lovely weekend.
____xxxxxxxxxx______ xxxxxxxxxxx
___xxx PASS xxxxxx___x xxxxxxxxxxxx
___xxxxxxxxxxxxxx_xx xxxxxxxxxxxx
___xxxxxxx THIS xxxxxx xxxxxxxxxxxx
____xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx xxxxxxxxxxx
_____xxxxxxxxx HEART x xxxxxxxxxxx
______xxxxxxxxxxxxxx xxxxxxxxx
_________xxxx TO xxxxx xxxxxxx
___________xxxxxxxxx xxxx
_____________xxxxx Allxx
______________xxxxxx
________THE x
_______________xxx
_______FRIENDS__xx
_____________x
_YOU_______x
_________xx
___CARE_xx
_____xxxx
__x ABOUT x
___xxxxxxx
____xx THE xxx
______xxxxxxxx
_MOST _xxxxxxxx
_________xxxxxxx
_________xxxxxxx
________xxxxxx
_____xxxxxxx
Sending you and your angel lots of love always henry~henry jur
WITH LOVE FROM TINA ALWAYS
GOD LOOKED AROUND HIS GARDEN AND FOUND AN EMPTY PLACE
HE THEN LOOKED DOWN UPON THE EARTH AND SAW YOUR TIRED FACE
HE PUT HIS ARMS AROUND YOU AND LIFTED YOU TO REST
GODS GARDEN MUST BE BEAUTIFULL
HE ONLY TAKES THE BEST
HE SAW THE ROAD AHEAD WAS ROUGH
AND THE HILLS WOULD BE HARD TO CLIMB
SO HE CLOSED YOUR WEARY EYELIDS AND WHISPERED
"PEACE BE THINE "
IT BROKE OUR HEARTS TO LOSE YOU
BUT YOU DID NOT GO ALONE
FOR PART OF ME WENT WITH YOU
THE DAY GOD CALLED YOU HOME
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
JUST TO SAY YOUR IN MY THOUGHTS .. LOVE HUGS KISSES FROM TINA ALWAYS XXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXX
For A Special Friend
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