| Location | Blackpool |
| Age | 44 years |
| Date of Birth | 12/1962 |
| Date of Death | 4/2007 |
| Visitors | 9,553 since 01/05/2007 |
| Creator |
´*•.¸(*•.¸♥ ¸.•*´)¸.•*´
♥«´¨`•°Bernard ´¨`»♥
¸.•*(¸.•*´♥ `*•.¸)`*•.¸
ღ Good morning Bernie ღ
. ♥ *Sprinkling* .
ღ. . * ♥ . ღ * . * ♥.
♥. *Your * Page ღ*
ღ . . * ♥ . * . * ღ
.* ღ With Loads .* ♥
. * ♥ * * ღ . * ♥ *
ღ * . of Love ♥ . *
My Angel
(\ ●♥● /)
( \(_)/ )
(_ /|\ _)
../___\
This is our big brother, he will always be remembered as being just "bernie" to myself and my
younger brother David.
Bernard Hamer 8th December 1962 - 28th April 2007 00.50am
Died age 44 years young.
My big brother bernard has been taken far too soon without a goodbye. And its on this website I
share my feeling emotionals and tributes to my brother without prejudice to anybody and its not my
intention to hurt or upset anybodt, but feelings are feelings and we all hurt because of Bernie's
death.
I have used some of your photos on this website to show everybody photos of Mike Jenny Jack Ethan
Megan Joshua and Ben, I have no photos of Jessica or Daniel I am sorry.
Bernards inquest was held on 25th October and the verdict was "Misadventure".
Cause of death *Poisoning by alcohol and Citalopram*
Bernie was a binge drinker and could go on real benders but he never took pills when he was drinking
daily which he drank alot of cider towards the end but his liver was not damaged in anyway, all his
organs were ok.
Your funeral was Monday 14th May at 2pm at Agecroft in the place where all our family have rested.
I think your at peace, but I will never know. you will be our dad Bernard Martin who sadly died by
taking his own life. Bernard has gone to spend the rest of eternity with our dad Bernard Martin.
I wished I had one chance to share my feelings with you face to face rather than like this, I came
to see you to say goodbye, I still cannot accept your gone. I cannot think of you without feeling
sad.
Life is not fair sometimes and you should not be where you are, you should be on the beach with the
kids having donkey rides, laughing and sharing the good times, or going to the bookies chewing pens,
one of your favourite annoying pastimes!!
Our dad Bernard Martin died by his own hand of suicide on January 15th 1973, He was 30years old
Bernie was 10years old when dad hung himself by a tree in a local school ground in Swinton.
Dads family never told my us about our dads death. We sat and read in the journal whilst living in
Clifton Drive in Swinton. Bernie always asked our mum why did ouir dad hanged himself. We were
aware of some letters that dad wrote before he died, but we never got to see them. Nobody ever gave
bernie or I the answers he so desparately needed to know. The fact was I didnt blame our mum for our
dads death I was younger than Bernie, but he always blamed our mum for dads death and that was sad
that she had to deal with that because it wasnt really fair.
Bernie over the years never came to terms with dads death, and I remember one of his own suicide
attempts he believed that he had seen our dad in the cremetery in walkden shouting him. Bernie
arrived home that night to mum and I, we ended up at the hospital. Bernie suffeered depression on
and off during his life and I believe dads death didnt help him he lived with not knowing for all
his life.
Bernards paranoia was his own worse enemy, and when he was down and depressed it was awful, it was
heartbreaking to see him sometimes. The times mum and I have ended up on hospital after he has tried
and failed to commit suicide is scary. Pressure was bad when we young, Bernie's seeked attention in
the wrong way. I remember him being in hospital on Christmas Day along time ago and not wanting to
see mum or I, how heartbreaking was that he must have been so drugged up he didnt know what was
going on.
I really wish bernie had contacted one of us before he died I cannot accept he mixed the substances
together, I had since found out he was in money debt and did this influence him?? that we will never
no. Something must have trigged this off and I believe we will never know the truth, I suppose I
accept I only know what I am told but it is a question that should have been anwered months ago.
Its sad that when you lose somebody in death the grief is hard to deal with, and 20 years ago when
Bernie was attempting suicide I was dealng with it in a better way. Now is not so easy as I do not
know the real reasons behind Bernie death and we know we will never find out and even if we did
would we believe it??
I still today coming up April 2008 one year after his death, do not accept Bernie death, I keep alot
of my feelings to myself and dont open up to many people, I wish I could but I cant its hurts too
much. I just wish he had made one phone call even if it had been to mum and he had not seen her for
over 3 years before he died. In that period of time Bernie had changed alot he drank and he gambled
as we know thats what bernie did before. But something different he had changed into somebody we
really didnt know and we had not been given the chance to know.
I ask myself would Bernie have really wanted to die?? did he leave a note?? we dont know and he knew
the tragic circunstances of our dad death that the "not knowing" was hardest thing to deal with,
questions run a mock in your head, WHY did he do this, what pushed him to? I believe Bernie did
take all those tablets and the drink and I believe in my own mind that he wanted peace... But why
leave a 16 week old baby????
I didnt attend Bernie inquests for reasons I do not wish to go into, at 42 years old I had been
informed third hand information which I believe was used a tool to cause distress and hurt. It was
Bernie's inquest and it was turned into a circus and a way to hurt people. Something that happened
42 yrs ago had nothing to do with this. Its sad at what some people will go to at length to cause
upset.
I got married 9th June 2007 I know you where there with my dad and James. I love you all very much,
Dave was there we shed a tear as you well know because somewhere in that room you were watching.. we
all felt sad dancing to your song and crying holding each other, looking at our photos of you and me
as kids next to our cake. You played a part in the service, Gary and Becky did you proud they shared
your memoires with over 60 guests, which left tears of you and James in everybodies eyes.
Rest in peace, my questions are stil not answered and I love you all the same, memories will stay
with me until one day we will meet again.
Bernard you are loved so much and this site is my tribute to your self with us and I share my love
and respect for you for all eternity.
On 28th April 2007, Bernie was in a sad sad place and what was going through his mind is scary and I
wish he had asked somebody for help, nothing is so bad that it cannot be resolved.
Only Bernie now knows the truth I sincerely hope my big brother is at peace, no more depression no
money tormention of his soul wanting answering to questions. His paranoia of life ended that sad
night and life as we know it will never be the same again.
Bernard Hamer - 8th December 1962 - 28th April 2007
Bernard Martin - 4th march 1943 - 15th January 1973
I hope you both are at peace you have both waited a lifetime for your souls to meet again. I cannot
change anything that has happened i wish you hadnt left us all.
I miss my brother and wish we all knew the truth and just one question for me would be WHY.
Pauline x
Gary & Becky xx
Dave x
xxxxxxxxxx
´*•.¸(*•.¸♥ ¸.•*´)¸.•*´
♥«´¨`•°Bernard¨`»♥
¸.•*(¸.•*´♥ `*•.¸)`*•.¸
As The Sun Came Up This Morning
I Watched You There Below
Your Hearts Seemed Oh So Heavy
But There's Something You Should Know
I'm Not Gone So Don't Worry
I'm Just a Step Ahead
and I'm With You Every Single Day
As You Rise up from Your Bed
I Am the Sun That Warms You
I Am the Moon's Soft Glow
I Am the Stars That Twinkle
And Light Your Path Below
So When At Times You Miss Me
Just Look For Me I'm there
For You Cannot Hide My Spirit
It Is with You Everywhere.
hugs to Hamer family xxx
THINKING OF YOU
FAITH isnt anything you can feel or touch ,
You feel it in your heart.
It keeps you trying when others have given up .
It keeps you believing in the goodness of others
And helps you find it ......
FAITH is trusting in a power greater than yourself
And knowing this power will carry you through anything
And having the courage to stand up
For what you believe in .............
FAITH is peace in the midst of a storm
Determination in the midst of adversity .
And safely in the midst of trouble
For nothing can touch a soul proctected by FAITH.......
++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++
YOUR TRULY AN ANGEL ON EARTH GOD BLESS YOU
++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++
YOU ARE BLESSED
You are blessed if your soul has Faith
and your Faith in God is strong
If ..... even when your heart is aching
It can still sing
An uplifting song .....
You are blessed ..........
If you find contentment in lifes simple ,priceless joys .
If you have a quiet spot to retreat from all the worlds noise ...................
If youre embraced with love by family ,friends and others
If you feel youre one with your world of sisters and brothers ......
If you can give a hug to those who need it most ..
If you can show the lonely that your heart is a welcoming host ........
If your hopes are high and you keep your dreams alive
If you dont think youll quit but persist and strive
YOU ARE BLESSED !
+++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++
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HELLO MY FRIEND JUST THINKING ABOUT YOU AND YOUR ANGEL IM SORRY FOR MISSED CANDLES ..... IM SENDING ALL MY LOVE HUGS KISSES TO YOU AND GOD BLESS YOU FOR ALL YOU ARE AND ALL YOU DO ..FROM TINA XXX
My family, tell a lot of lies, they never did before,
From now until the day they die, they'll tell a whole Lot more.
They used to tell the truth a lot, but now it doesn't Matter,
I died and went to heaven, now their life is all Shatter’d.
Ask my family how they are, and they'll say "oh Yes I'm fine!"
But they want to beg, "Please help me, ‘cause I’ve Lost that dad of mine".
Ask my family how they are, and they'll say, "oh I'm Alright",
If that's the truth then tell me please, why do they Cry each night?
Ask my family how thy are ’cause they seems to cope So well,
They didn't have a choice, you see, nor yet the Strength to yell.
You think you know the feeling, but in fact this Cann't be,
For even though you loved me, it was not as much as My family did.
They’ll smile and they will tell you, "It's OK, God Has a plan”
But then they’ll turn away and cry, ‘cause they can't Understand why ????.
You tell a joke they giggle, but in fact their not OK,
They wants to share the joke with me, but it won’t be Today.
I watch my family from here in Heaven, their distress Disturbs My peace,
Will someone please take care of them, and thus take Care of me?
"Some day you will feel better", "Yes I will one day" They lie,
They knows this won't happen until they day they die.
Ask my family how they are and they'll say, "I’m Doing good"
They cannot tell you how they feel - oh, how I wish They could.
Ask my family how they are: "I'm ok, I'm fine, I'm Coping.”
For God's sake, just tell the truth and say your Heart is broken.
Ask my family how they are and they’ll reply "I'm Well, and you?”
I'll shake my head in Heaven, ‘cause it simply isn't True.
They'll love me all their life's, just like I loved Them all of mine,
The'll lie and try to hide the pain, pretending that They are fine.
Their carnival is over, they have stepped off the Carousel,
But to save you feeling bad they'll say, "Yes thank You, all is well".
My family haven't gone mad quite yet, but oh, so very Near,
Don't ask them how their doing, ask them how they are Doing ...REALLY.
I’m watching them from Heaven, and I cann't hug them From here,
So if they lie to you, don't listen to them, but Please hug them and hold them close.
On the day we'll meet for ever we shall smile and I'll be bold:
"You're lucky to get in here with all the lies You've told!!"
God bless XXXXX
Sorry I'v not been on for a few days things have not been to good, but you and your angel have been in my thoughts and prays love always Sandra & Michaela & our angels Peter, David & Violet XXXXX
Have a lovely weekend.
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Sending you and your angel lots of love always henry~henry jur
As you release this butterfly in honour of me,
Know that I'm with you and will always be.
Hold a hand, say a prayer, close your eyes and see me There.
Although you may feel a bit torn apart,
Please know that I'll be forever in your heart.
Now fly away butterfly as high as you can go,
I'm right there with you more than you know.
xxxxx
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THANKYOU FOR EVERY THING YOU DO YOU ARE A TRUE FRIEND LOVE SANDRA & MICHAELA & OUR ANGELS PETER, DAVID & VIOLET XXXXX
THE ROSE BEYOND THE WALL
A rose once grew
Where all could see
Sheltered beside a garden wall
And as the days passed swiftly by
It spread its branches staight and tall
One day,a beam of light
Shone through a crevice
That opened wide
The rose bent gently
Towards its warmth
Then passed beyond
To the other side
Now,you who deeply feel its loss
Be comforted the rose blooms there
Its beauty even greater now
Nurured by Gods own loving care
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I just wanted to say a massive thank you for your continued support for me,my family but most of all mary you will never know how much you have helped us
through our darkest days.what makes it so special is that you to are grieving for the loss of your loved one you truly are an angel here on earth.God bless you xxxxx
SOMEONE"S WATCHING OVER YOU
Someone"s watching over you with the greatest love.
Someone"s wants you to be happy,safe,and secure ,
Someone considers you a wonderfull individual and cares about your needs ........
Someone"s making blessings for your benefit right now --
like sunshine for those rainy days and rainbows to remind you of the promise up ahead ..........
Someone"s watching over you today and always.
and HE will take good care of you ..........
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GOD BLESS THE ANGELS ON EARTH READING THIS +++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++
JUST WANT TO SAY THAT MAYBE MY CANDLES ARE NOT AS REGULAR AS THEY SHOULD BE BUTS ITS PURELY BECAUSE I CANNOT JUST FIND THE TIME WITH ONE THING AND ANOTHER BUT MY GTS FRIEND YOU AND YOUR ANGEL ARE ALWAYS IN MY THOUGHTS EVERY SINGLE DAY AND I TRY TO MAKE UP FOR MISSED CANDLES AS MUCH AS I CAN JUST REMEMBER IM THINKING OF YOU AND IM SENDING ALL MY LOVE HUGS KISSES TO YOU YOUR ANGEL AND YOUR FAMILY AND CANNOT THANK YOU ENOUGH FOR ALL YOUR SUPPORT THESE LAST FEW MONTHS YOUR TRULY ANGELS ON EARTH GOD BLESS YOU FROM TINA XX
♥ღ♥ Gone Only To Others ♥ღ♥
Others, who do not know,
Tiptoe around your name
Unaware that your name is silently
Written on my heart, my soul, my life
And inwardly I cry out to hear it spoken.
Others who do not know
Think of you as only in the past,
And believe
That you only exist in my past too
Not understanding that you are
Past, Present, Future.
Others, who do not know,
Feel you as gone,
And fail to see the reality of you
Never being ‘truly’ gone from me.
The empty void of your absence
Is filled with your presence,
Your life will forever weave through mine
The divine bond cannot be severed.
Others who do not know,
Mistakenly may think that my love has been
Weakened by separation,
Feelings ceased,
Not so.
Entwined and strengthened
My love for you lives on
And has not died with death.
But you know all this,
If only others knew.
Dear Pauline, Sorry for the delay in writing Bernard's tribute, I have moved house and everything has all been up in the air lately. Thinking of you always. Love Mel (Grace and Francis Doe)
My dear family
Dry your tears today
You know I love you so
It hurts me much to see you cry
Cos my family don't you know
I'll never leave you all alone
I've never left your hearts
God took me by the hand that day
He said we would never part
He kept his promise to me
I visit you all the time
You are the sweetest family
An angel here could have
If I could write a letter
I'm sure you know I would
To let you know I'm safe from harm
And that heaven is a real good place
I'm here with many angels
Some that you may know
Those angels send all their love
To all of you below
I know one day we'll meet again
On the day that you come home
I've saved a place for you my loved ones
It's near gods precious throne
I'll wrap my arms around you and
Lead you up gods stairs
Till then my lovely family
Carry on and dry those tears
Please do me one big favour
Look after one another
Please take the time to smile and think
That you still have each other.
LOVE ALWAYS BERNIE XXXXX
A SMILE FOR YOU
Smiling is infectious, you catch it like the flu
When some one smiled at me today I started Smiling too
I passed around the corner and someone saw my Grin
When he smiled I realized I'd passed it on to him
I thought about that smile and realised its Worth.
A single smile just like mine could travel around The earth.
So if you feel a smile begining don’t leave it Undetected
Lets start an epidemic quick and get the world Infected
EVERY ONE NEEDS A SMILE
LOVE ALWAYS SANDRA & MICHAELA & OUR ANGELS PETER, DAVID & VIOLET XXXXX
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To My Friend As Always.Love Sandra xxxx
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